Okay. Three points:
First rant: In regards to a past post, many people (men and women) protested, because my remarks suggested that men can’t help being mindless, horny, pigs. Let me be clear. I am not suggesting this. I am stating it. As a fact.
It’s a widely accepted fact that the average man has a sexual thought once every three seconds. There’s good reason for this. Using only two-thirds of our thinking power, we’ve managed to make nuclear missiles, sniper rifles, mustard gas, M. Night Shyamalan movies, and Windows Vista. Can you, dear reader, imagine the destruction we might unleash if we used our full computing power? <shudder>
If anything, we need to think about sex more to further distract us from our mission of self-annihilation. It’s the only path to world peace. Consider that the countries with the least sexual restrictions are less prone to war. Consider that those countries with the most sexual restrictions demonstrate the opposite effect.
Second rant: I am sick of people telling me how much safer they feel living in a gated community. You people are standing on a crust-covered ball of lava that’s spinning around a ticking time bomb in the form of a mammoth fireball, flinging us through a vacuum four hundred degrees below freezing as meteors burble, galumph, and snicker-snack around us with the speed and power to wipe out every trace of our existence.
What the hell is your cute, little gate going to do? Nothing. That’s what.
Finally: Not too long ago, Mitt Romney shamelessly pandered to southern voters by saying “Y’all” and claiming to have tried grits for the first time. His supporters met this with wild applause. Immediately afterwards, Newt Gingrich smeared Romney for only just now having tried grits. Gingrich assured his supporters that he, Gingrich, has eaten grits “all my life.” His supporters greeted this with wilder, heated cheers.
This matters? We deserve a shitty president. We honestly do.
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