Speeches

Congratulations to President Obama for an excellent speech last night—though my ears did prick when he mentioned the subject of copyright infringement. I hope that isn’t an indication that he plans to support SOPA or any bill resembling it.

When watching President Obama’s speeches, I love most to observe Vice President, Joe Biden and Speaker of the House, John Boehner. Biden always looks as if he’s about to fall asleep. Boehner always appears on the verge of tears.

Biased as I am, I cannot imagine such compassionate speeches coming from presidential hopeful, Newt Gingrich, who strikes me as about as warm as a dead penguin and as empathetic as Simpson’s character, Montgomery Burns.

Gingrich does show a lot of compassion for his own feelings, though. He has called out both a moderator and his rival, Romney at separate debates for attacking him. Never mind the fact that he hasn’t an issue with running his own attack ads or the fact that the moderator who offended him had only alluded to some fair points. The moderator had questioned Gingrich on his alleged demands of an “open marriage” with his second wife. While this might strike someone as a nonissue, it isn’t, because Gingrich claims to fight for “traditional marriage,” which, really would be a man purchasing another man’s daughter to cook, clean, and bear children while she hold little to no say regarding the issue, but I digress. It also seems noteworthy that Gingrich hadn’t a moral dilemma investigating Former President, Bill Clinton’s lack of marital fidelity.

On the note of Gingrich’s supposed request of an open marriage, my pity for his second wife, Marianne Gingrich, remains limited. Marianna had an affair with Newt while his first wife, Jackie, had cancer. Had Marianna any right being struck surprised when her new hubby cheated on her right when she developed health issues of her own?

Returning to the issue of speeches, I can’t imagine Romney giving an emotionally charged speech any more than I could Gingrich. Less so, in fact. Romney speaks the way Daniel Defoe writes. Have you ever read Robinson Crusoe? It reads to the tune of:

And so I considered the possibility of perhaps maybe confronting the cannibals, or not, that is to say, it seemed a definite possible possibility, if perhaps it turned out to be one, though I’m not saying that it was, but it could be, as I knew not what else to possibly do if and when I decided to consider the possibility of a confrontation, which, as of yet, I have not, though I might in the near future—all things depending upon countless variables that I had not yet considered but would once the moment decided to present itself for such a decision, assuming such a moment arrived, which it might or might not, I cannot say which, as I cannot see the future, but if I could, I suppose I would know, but seeing that I do not, I don’t, as far as I currently know at this time . . . .

            Seriously, Romney is one of the worst public speakers alive, and Robinson Crusoe is the most boring book ever written—and I’m including phone books in this comparison.